Guess Who Blames Boston Marathon Bombing on “Fag Marriage?”

Westboro Baptist Church At It Again

While the nation mourns the victims of the Boston Marathon, the hate group Westboro Baptist Church, took to twitter on April 15, 2013, to deliver this vitrolic message with a photo of the bombing:  “In light of today’s events, I must again ask:  How is that fag marriage working out for you, America?!?!”

Westboro Baptist Church Blames Any Disturbance on Gay Marriage

Technically not a Baptist Church, this Topeka, Kansas “church” is composed of relatives of founder Fred Phelps.  Last year, Westboro blamed Superstorm Sandy on gay marriage.  It is best known for its protests of U.S. service members.  They often picket for maximum exposure which angers local residents.  In 1998, it picketed the funeral of Matthew Shepard, a gay man, twenty-one years-old University of Montana student, who was brutally attacked, then left to die on a fence where he was tied in Wyoming.

As you may recall, the fundamentalist group was planning on picketing the funeral of the elementary school principal who was murdered in Newtown, Connecticut school last December.  However, they were unsuccessful; volunteers blocked access to the funeral until church members changed their plans.

Tweets from this Fundamentalist Group

Other tweets this week on April 16, 2013, had a photo of a man comforting a female victim with blood splattered along a Boston Marathon sidewalk.  The message read:  “Look at this image – sent directly frm God!  He promised to cast ur bloody carcasses on ur flag idol!” #WBCIsSoThankful. jpic.twitter.com/NZfy7S2Ojg.

The WBC tweeted following the explosions at the finish line of the Boston Marathon on April 15th celebrated the killings and said that the death of eight-year-old Martin Richard was “God’s punishment.”  “His blood is on YOUR hands.  Died for “SSM”(same-sex marriage) tweeted church member Margie Phelps. Another tweet said:  “Memo to Boston police:  Is it time to re-think that mistreat and abuse WBC policy you implemented many years ago?!?!”

A news release dated April 15th stated that Massachusetts invited this special wrath from God Almighty when it was the FIRST STATE to pass same-sex marriage” in 2004.  The church intends to picket the funerals of Boston Marathon’s victims. Westboro did not respond to an e-mail from U.S. News seeking details about the picket plans.  On April 16th, the church’s line was constantly busy.  So far, there are no Massachusetts events currently listed on the church’s online protest schedule.

A petition on the White House’s “We the People” website urges authorities to “ban” the church members from entering Boston where President Obama will be speaking.

 

 

Hawaii Bed & Breakfast Found Exclusive By Judge

Lesbian Couple Not Welcome

A lesbian couple from Southern California were asked to leave the Aloha Bed & Breakfast in Honolulu, Hawaii after requesting an overnight room with one bed in 2007.  Phyllis Young, the B& B owner, turned them away after she asked  Diance Cervelli and Taeko Bufford if they were planning on sleeping in just one bed together.  Young said she was uncomfortable accommodating gay people in her home because of her religious views and claimed that only married couples can book rooms.

The Couple Sues in 2011

Cervelli and Bufford sued Aloha Bed & Breakfast for discrimination.  Said Cervelli, after the ruling, “in my past experiences in Hawaii, people have been so friendly.  It was just hurtful.  It made me feel we weren’t good enough,”  Lambda Legal represented the couple. The Hawaii Civil Rights Commission also joined the lawsuit to protect and enforce the state anti-discrimination law.

The Judge Rules

Hawaiian First Circuit Judge ruled in favor of the lesbian couple and said the expulsion was an act in clear violation of the state’s public accommodations law. This law prohibits business owners from discriminating against customers based on race, color, religion, disability, and sexual orientation.

Lambda Legal Staff Attorney Peter Renn commented “you can roll up the welcome mat when you see a lesbian or gay couple, just as you can’t refuse to do business with Jewish customers, African-American customers, or disabled customers. Commission Executive Director William Hoshijo said “the court’s decision is based on Hawaii’s strong state civil rights laws which prohibit discrimination.  When visitors or residents are subjected to discrimination, they suffer the sting of indignity, humiliation and outrage, but we are all demeaned and our society diminished by unlawful discrimination.”

Lawyer for Aloha Bed & Breakfast

The attorney representing Aloha Bed and Breakfast, Jim Hochberg, claims his client’s decision is protected under her First Amendment rights, and laws governing businesses have no place in his client’s home.” However, the judge’s ruling doesn’t seem to stop Young from planning on repeating her actions in the future.  She told the Hawaii Human Rights Commission that homosexuality is “detestable” and “defies our land.”

Embrace Your Past

Never forget where you come from but strive for a place you have never been.”  — Nishan Panwar

How many times have we heard people lament their past and wish they could blot it out of their memories forever.  I know I have done it.  I look back and just cringe at some of the things I did!

The nice thing about life is that we can decide to not dwell on the past and live in the moment and move on to bigger and better things.  The past is past; we cannot change it no matter how hard we try.

On the flip side, however, while we may not be able to change our past, do we really want to forget it?  Our past is part of us and it has gotten us to the point we are currently at.  Instead of lamenting our past we need to embrace it and look for lessons we have learned that we can carry forward to the future in order to arrive at places we have never been.  For some embracing their past is a very difficult thing to do.

Before moving on, it’s important that I clarify an important point in terms of embracing the past and living in it.  Embracing it versus living in it are two very distinct things.  When we embrace our past we are accepting it as part of us and are willing to learn important life lessons that can be utilized for many years to come.  Embracing our past is a healthy part of our growth process, as it is grounded in optimism and hope that we can use past knowledge to not make the same mistakes.

Living in the past is simply a form of self-pity in that focus is on our mistakes and wishing we had done some things differently.  There is always second guessing about our decisions and contemplation over what our current conditions would be like if we hadn’t done certain things.  Clearly living in the past is not a healthy condition, as it is grounded in regrets, remorse and not looking forward to what can be.  There is a failure to realize that tomorrow is a new day and that a new beginning is always possible.

How do embrace our past?  What purpose does it serve to try to understand where we were and to analyze decisions made to learn lessons for future benefit?  Embracing one’s past is a two-fold experience.  Not only does it help us understand ourselves, it also allows us to help others since we have wisdom and understanding of situations that others may be experiencing.

Our lives are in perpetual motion.  We are always moving toward a better state of being both personally, financially and otherwise.  Many, myself included, are on a path toward enlightenment; a better understanding of who we are and what makes us tick as people.  Embracing one’s past allows us to understand the things we need to change in order to progress forward toward that desired enlightened condition.

As we evolve into the people we are meant to be, we become more of an “open book” where we are so comfortable with ourselves, that we can begin to freely discuss our experiences without a filter of shame and guilt. We understand that by being so open, it helps those experiencing the same things we did make sense of their lives and facilitate answers to their questions about their own self-worth.

By embracing our past, we bring forward that which we like and are assets to achieve what we need to achieve.  By doing so, we are healthier individuals with a lesser degree of stress since we understand the past cannot be changed and that it is part of us until the day we die.  So many people deny their past and do not come to terms with it and embrace it as part of them and their undeniable essence. Those people tend to be much more tense, stressed out and just not all that pleasant to hang around.  Which one do you choose to be?

Living in the past will ultimately destroy any chance of self-improvement and advancement to a more perfect state of being.  Having regrets over decisions made in the past become an obsession and prevent one from thinking clearly about their future.  It is much worse to arrive at the end of our lives realizing that we had  focused on our regrets so much that it prevented us from becoming who we were meant to be.  When that realization comes at that point in your life, it will be too late.  Don’t let that happen!

Embrace your past but stop living in it!  Take what you can use and leave behind what you cannot.  Make a decision today to start a new day grounded in optimism and hope, and not one premised on regret, remorse and fear of the future.

Youtube Coming Out Videos Debate

Youtube.com Logo

I’m sure all of you have looked at coming out videos on Youtube at some point. Each day somebody who is gay, lesbian, bisexual and/or transgenered submits videos to share their stories with others. These videos help out many kids or even adults who are dealing with coming out. You have a choice to watch these videos or not. The people who are submitting these videos get a lot of feedback either positive or negative. I would like to share with you all one of the negative feedbacks from somebody that is straight. Check out the video below:

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ogC_v9C_y_Q]Here’s the Link to “35. Why is it with the gay and lesbian issue and coming out? Zippy Poozelah” Youtube Video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ogC_v9C_y_Q

Question: Is it okay for LGBTQ people showing their coming out stories online especially when straight people don’t get to say hey I’m straight?

My stance is that it is okay to post coming out videos. I am gay and these videos and blogs out there on the web have helped me deal with my own sexuality. My view is if you don’t like a certain video than don’t watch. Everybody is entitled to their own views. We all wish we could be straight and life would be easier. I feel straight people mostly don’t understand what we have to deal with on a daily basis. Be sure to share your views about this in the comments section.

Uruguay Legalizes Gay Marriage

3rd Country in Western Hemisphere to Approve Same-Sex Marriage

The bill, approved by the Lower House with 71 of the 92 lawmakers present, was voted on April 10, 2013.  Earlier in April, the Senate approved the legislation 23 to 8 votes. “The Marriage Equality Project” was already approved by majorities in both legislative houses, but Senators made changes that required a final vote by the deputies.  President Jose Mujica is expected to sign the bill into law within ten days.  By mid-July, same-sex couples should be able to marry.

We are living in a historic moment” – Federico Grana

Federico Grana, one of the leaders of the gay rights group Black Sheep Collective, and drafter of the bill, called the vote a “historic moment.”  “The country is settling its debts with a large number of citizens who for the simple fact of loving someone of the same sex have suffered bullying and harassment.”  Damian Diaz, a gay 25-year-old teacher remarked that this passage means full equality under the law.  “We’re definitely going to feel now that we live in a place where we’re recognized for who we are, where we get more respect and more acceptance.”

What “The Marriage Equality Project” Means

A largely Catholic country, Uruguay’s Roman Catholic Church asked lawmakers to vote their conscience and challenged the label of “marriage equality” as a false pretext, calling it an inconsistent assimilation that will only further weaken marriage, not justice.” The Catholic Church through the Uruguayan Episcopal Conference said lawmakers weren’t taking into account the legal consequences of the bill and how it might affect society’s views of family.

Under the new law, gay couples will be able to marry for the first time, with the same legal rights and responsibilities as married couples of the opposite sex. It has adopted a single set of rules in its marriage contracts for everyone, gay or straight, in which the words “husband and wife” will be replaced with a gender-neutral description of “contracting parties.”

The law permits all gay couples to have the ability to adopt or have children through in-vitro fertilization and can choose which parent’s last name comes first for the child’s.  It also updates divorce laws in Uruguay so that either spouse will be able to unilaterally request a divorce and get one.  The new law raises the minimum age for marriage to sixteen for both genders, from 12 years-old for girls and 14 for boys.

Uruguay, a small country with about 3.3 million people, is one of eleven countries that allows gay marriage:  the Netherlands, Belgium, Spain, Canada, South Africa, Norway, Sweden, Portugal, Iceland, Denmark and its neighbor, Argentina.  Uruguay has a reputation for its long history of progressive social legislation.  It was an early adopter of a minimum wage and labor laws that protect workers in the early 20th century.

 

 

Bisbee, Arizona Recognizes Gay Unions Despite Constitutional Ban

Attorney General Warns City Council:  Civil Union Ordinance Unconstitutional

Bisbee, the former mining town, now an arts centre, has become the first jurisdiction in Arizona to recognize same-sex marriage.  On April 9, 2013, this small town of under 6,000 voted 5-2 to legalize same-sex civil unions despite the threat of legal action against it by the Arizona Attorney General Tom Horne. The civil unions measure is due to come into effect in May.

Horne’s Warning to the City Council

Horne sent a letter to Bisbee’s City Council on April 2, 2013, prior to the vote warning that the Civil Union Ordinance, if passed, would be unconstitutional and require the Attorney General’s office to initiate an action to stop or enjoin the Ordinance.  The letter was in response to a complaint received from all three of  the state legislators representing Bisbee:  Senator Gail Griffin, Representative David Gowan and Representative David Stevens.

Horne stated that “the only proper way to change a statute is through the legislature, not through actions of the city council attempting to change a state statute within its boundaries. My job is to enforce the laws that exist and I’m obligated to respond to complaints from state legislators.”  Civil union recognition violates existing statutes.  The statute says the issue is nothing about civil unions and only bans “marriage between persons of the same sex,” according to Horne.

According to Horne, the ordinance seeks to change seven separate state statutes within the boundaries of the city, dealing with issues such as community property, inheritance of property, and appointment of personal representatives. The unions would extend a number of important and everyday benefits such as an affirmation of visitation rights in hospitals, family passes for recreational events and the chance for a partner to “buy in” on certain benefits. The ordinance allows any couple, regardless of their sex or sexual orientation, to have a civil union.

Horne contends that the Bisbee ordinance changes the law on such matters as community property access.  The real question seems to hinge on whether the city council has the authority not to change the law, which it doesn’t appear to have done here in any substantial way, but to exceed current state law and institute civil unions.

It’s a Big Step in the right direction.  For a Tiny Town….”

                          Town council member Gene Conners

According to Bisbee Town Council member Gene Conners, who has lived in Bisbee since 1992, with the ordinance, “we’re just acknowledging the people that live here.”  Bisbee town council plans for $76, the same cost of a marriage license at the county courthouse, to begin issuing civil union certificates to same-sex couples.  These certificates will only be legally recognized within the town’s limits.

The state constitutional amendment to ban marriage equality called Proposition 102 and passed in 2008 at the ballot, mandates that Arizona defines marriage as between a man and a woman  and banned same-sex marriage in its constitution. A bill for civil unions is currently before Arizona’s Republican controlled state legislature.

 

France Senate Votes to Approve Marriage Equality

Senate Voted to Approve Section 1 of Same-Sex Marriage Bill

After ten hours of debate, the socialist-controlled Senate, the upper house of the French parliament, on April 9, 2013, approved the most crucial article of a draft law that would legalize same-sex marriage in France.  Article 1 removes opposite gender as a condition of the right to marriage and was adopted by a vote of 179 to 157.  This article was approved by the National Assembly, the lower house of the French parliament run by Socialists, on February 2nd, but 5,000 anti-gay marriage amendments were added to it to slow down the passage of the legislation.  By a vote of 329 to 229, the entire bill won approval on February 12, 2013.

Future Votes in Senate

The Senate is now poised to vote on the rest of the many amendments, one by one, including adoption rights for same-sex couples before sending the entire bill back for final approval to the National Assembly.  The passing of Article 1 was considered to be the legislation’s biggest hurtle and almost guarantees that gay couples will be able to marry by June.  Unless the entire bill is rejected after consideration by the Senate, it will become final, and not be subjected to a second reading in the National Assembly or the CMP (Mixed Commission).

Majority in Favor of Gay Marriage

Although most polls show support for gay marriage, for the past six months, hundreds of thousands have participated in demonstrations in opposition of marriage equality in this Catholic country. Most of the anti-gay factions are backed by conservative religious institutions, which claim that the legislation will create psychological and social problems for children.

If the legislation passes, France will become the latest country – sixteen in four continents – to have legal same-sex marriage.  President Francois Hollande has already said he will sign the law.  Hollande campaigned in favor of same-sex marriage and adoption last year.

Secure and Confident: Part 2

In a prior blog post I had written about the secure and confident environments we all had as children.  I had also touched upon how, as we grow older, those secure worlds we had as children begin to crumble and are replaced by other much less secure and confident conditions due to external influences that begin to impact us.  The purpose of this essay is to carry those general concepts forward and describe this evolution we all face in more personal terms.

Looking back on my childhood, many aspects were quite similar to those of other children I was growing up with.  I liked to play and hang out with my friends.  I went to school and experienced much of the same trials and tribulations that others around me were experiencing, but my secure world seemed to have started to crumble very early in my life.

There was something deeper inside of me that I could not put my fingers on.  I sensed something “different” was going on with me, and I began to internalize it and not focus on it much.  Due to this subliminal knowledge that I was not quite like the other kids I hung around, I started to do many more things on my own, became much more of a “loner” and began to sense a rebelliousness inside of me at a very young age, that would carry through to my adult life.

In elementary school, I didn’t know what gay/straight was and didn’t have any real conception of what it meant to be attracted to another of the same sex.  Despite this relative “innocence” I knew as early as 1st grade that I was wired differently when for Valentines Day, I would look forward to the other boys in the class giving me a valentine; much more so than those from the girls.

Another sure sign of my evolving sexuality came in 4th and 5th grade when my infatuation with other boys began to manifest, with sexual experimentation with another friend of mine.  We would steal away to secluded spots along the river bank and in the woods, and in each other’s homes when we were alone.

We would just gaze at each other at first, but then it became more physical than simply childhood wonderment.  There were a couple “close calls” but we recovered and formulated quick excuses, but looking back upon those times now, I don’t believe the people we made the excuses to really believed that we were not doing something more than what we actually said we were doing.

These feelings carried through year after year and just started to get much stronger.  With every reinforcement of this attraction to other boys, I became more reclusive and withdrawn to the point where my parents and others around me began to notice and were concerned over my welfare.  I remember my mom telling me later in life, that my grandmother who lived with us, was worried about me and often wondered what would become of me.

It was not until late 6th grade and definitely 7th grade when my secure world would crash down around me, due to the evolving process called “puberty.”  I had clear and unequivocal self knowledge that I liked the boys better than the girls!  But times being what they were, one could not express themselves openly and pronounce their sexual preferences at such a young age. Thus began the formulation of that “second life.”

It is at this point in my life that living a lie became the norm and I buried my true self even deeper and became even more rebellious and reclusive.  I would also allow people to come into my world but only to a certain point, at which they were then shut out and repelled from going any further out of fear of someone finding out about what lay within me.  All this combined with the normal sexual awakening that comes with puberty, just wreaked unbelievable havoc on my psyche and would shape who I would be for many, many years to come.

I have to say that this insecurity with myself combined with all the changes one goes through as an adolescent, shaped my relationships with many people, including my father.  We always seemed to log heads and I would many times buck his authority.  I now realize that the problem was never really my father.  It was mine and mine alone.  I actually think it was a response to my internal fears of being who I was, that I had to project my fears into some sense of security and confidence in myself by rebelling against the primary male role model that was closest to me.  It was in a sense, my way of empowering my evolving manhood that was seriously in question due to my emerging sexual orientation.

Unfortunately, living a lie does hurt those closest to you sometimes, and for that I sincerely regret.  However, this fence has been mended, as far as I am concerned, since I am no longer living my life as someone else, and have been able to come to grips with my sexual demons, and see things in much better perspective.

Even though I am very comfortable in my skin now and have evolved into the person I have become by rejecting the falsehoods upon which I based much of my existence, there clearly are lingering issues from my past that still drag me down.  After so many years of not letting people get close, and denying one’s true self, old habits die hard.

While I have come to grips with much of my past, and my relationships with my family, especially my father, there are still inadequacies in my internal makeup.  Living in the closet and denying who I really was has deprived me of many friendships and opportunities at true love.  I have never really learned what it means to be in love with someone, and to experience sexual gratification within a loving relationship.  It has also deprived me of many opportunities to be part of a larger support network of caring and understanding individuals that I could fall back on for help and just get a hug or two, or three from.

As I stated in my prior blog post, we need to create new paradigms of thought that reject past secure and stable conditions premised on lies and falsehoods, as the basis by which we try to derive solutions to current issues.  While I feel sad over the self-deprivation and my resistance to free myself much sooner, I am also optimistic that I can and will overcome that which still drags me down and regulates my movement forward away from  my past.

Our past is part of us. We cannot deny it but we can leave it behind.  However, we can and should carry forward those lessons learned in our past to become better people in the future.  I am comforted that I have been able to move ahead with my life, and leave many of my insecurities behind.  I am also comforted that I was introduced to a woman, who has opened my eyes to much of what has been hidden within myself and she has given me an ability to see what I can be and will evolve into as long as I am open to the possibilities.

Unfortunately many people do not learn from their mistakes or are given an opportunity to see what they can become.  Are you open to the possibilities?  I encourage you do so.  It is never too late to turn yourself around and get on the right path to your future and becoming who you are truly meant to be.

Homophobic Greek Travel Ad

A Greek flight and travel company is causing a stir with it’s most recent advertising campaign that appears to draw upon old, outdated homophobic stereotypes of gay men being predatory and lecherous.

The AirFasttickets video, published on video sharing site YouTube and other media outlets features a handsome young male hitchhiker who is then picked up by a trucker. All seems well until the trucker is revealed as a gay man and then the stereotypes flood out rapidly. The truck driver makes supposedly suggestive glances at the hitchhiker and each time the hitchhiker looks increasingly uncomfortable.

The strap line of the ad is that to avoid similar uncomfortable situations people should book with AirFasttickets.

Homophobia has steadily been on the increase on Greece since the debt crisis started during the early part of 2010 and the ever changing political situation in the financially troubled nation. In November last year, in central Athens, large anti-gay protesters and members of Greek neo-Nazi party Golden Dawn succeeded in forcing a theatre company into closing its production of Corpus Christi, which portrays Jesus Christ as a gay man.

Also in November last year Greek state television decided to censor out a gay kiss scene in the popular British drama Downton Abbey, sparking fears that a change in attitudes it could be down to the influence of Golden Dawn.

Golden Dawn, known for its homophobic and racist anti-immigrant stance, has been on the political ascendancy since Greece’s 2012 elections. “There is a lot more hostility on the streets these days. I have been refused service in a convenience store for being gay and it is getting to the point where I don’t feel safe walking in certain neighbourhoods” a gay contact reported yesterday.

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IEDMR5mOEDU]
Watch the ad on YouTube.

Coming Out No way In

The true story of why professional soccer player Robbie Rogers had to retired immediately after coming out as the UK’s only openly gay top flight professional soccer player.

It was only this February that the then Leeds play who has also represented the United States in 18 international football matches, opened his heart and revealed his true sexuality, then promptly walked away from the beautiful game. In his first interview for UK media since he came out, he explained his hurt, anger and how it is still virtually impossible for gay players to come out and remain in the game.

Robbie Rogers is a long way from home and the self confessed Californian dude who grew up playing soccer, surfing and going to church faces a somewhat uncertain future after his recent revelation which stunned many in the professional football world. “Life is simple when your secret is gone. Gone is the pain that lurks in the stomach at work, the pain from avoiding questions, and at last the pain from hiding such a deep secret.” Robbie wrote on his website, “Secrets can cause so much internal damage,” Rogers wrote. “People love to preach about honesty, how honesty is so plain and simple. Try explaining to your loved ones after 25 years you are gay.”

As soon as those words were out there in the public domain, Rogers instantly became only the second gay footballer in Britain to ever publicly come out. The first was the late Justin Fashanu, whose experience after coming out was far from celebratory and positive. He faced a saver backlash from colleagues inside the professional footballing world and his family, including homophobic brother John, turned their backs, Justin took his own life in 1988, hanging himself at home in Shoreditch, London. Coincidentally, just a short walk from where Robbie Rogers now lives.

Since coming out, Rogers says he’s been besieged by large offers of money for expose type interviews and contracts, as well as moving emails from thousands of people who have thanked him or asked for advice on coming to terms with their sexuality. Last weeks interview with the UK’s Guardian newspaper marks the first major interview since coming out and readdresses some of the issues his declaration raises. Not least the difficulties that professional sportsmen and women face when coming out publicly. “Football is an amazing sport,” Rogers says. “But it is also a brutal sport that picks people up and slams them on their heads. Adding the gay aspect doesn’t make a great cocktail.”

The interview poses the question what would have happened if Rogers had still been playing for Leeds when he came out? “That would have been interesting,” he says wryly. “I don’t think I would have been able to go training the next day. That would be so scary. The guys might have said, ‘That’s great, Robbie.’ Maybe. But because no-one’s done it and because of the things I’ve heard in the dressing room I just thought: ‘I need to get away from this – make my announcement, find peace, go from there.’ So I can never imagine announcing that at Leeds.”

Would it have been different if he were back in America? “No. Not at any club – anywhere.” He says emphatically. It is true to say that In almost all sport, especially at a professional level there is a certain about of bravado and banter, but even light hearted banter can be callous and hurtful, “There were different emotions.” Rogers explains when asked how he reacted when team mates made homophobic quips and jokes. “Sometimes I would feel bad for them. Sometimes I would laugh because it was kinda funny. And, sometimes, it got malicious.”

“That was when I would get this awful feeling in my stomach. I would turn my head and try to chat about other things. They often don’t mean what they say. It’s that pack mentality – they’re trying to get a laugh, they’re trying to be the top guy. But it’s brutal. It’s like high school again – on steroids.”

The fear of hostility from team mates is one issue that prevents more gay soccer plays from coming out, another would be the reaction from the supporters. “Maybe a lot of fans aren’t homophobic. But, in a stadium, sometimes they want to destroy you. In the past I would have said: ‘They don’t know I’m gay so it doesn’t mean anything.’ But, now they know it, am I going to jump in the stands and fight them?” Indeed homophobic chanting from the terraces is regular occurrence during many games up and down the country on a Saturday, despite various campaigns to combat homophobia in the sport.

Robbie Rogers

Rogers came to the realisation that “In football it’s obviously impossible to come out – because no-one has done it. No one. It’s crazy and sad. I thought: ‘Why don’t I step away and deal with this and my family and be happy?’ Imagine going to training every day and being in that spotlight? It’s been a bit of a circus anyway – but that would have been crazy. And you wouldn’t have much control because clubs are pushing you in different directions. I was just fearful. I was very fearful how my team-mates were going to react. Was it going to change them? Even though I’d still be the same person would it change the way they acted towards me – when we were in the dressing room or the bus?”

It would be incredibly powerful if a gay footballer could face down that hate and abuse – just as black sportsmen like Jackie Robinson and Muhammad Ali stood up to racism in America. “Sure,” Rogers says. “I’ve thought about that. I might be strong enough but I don’t know if that’s really what I want. I’d just want to be a footballer. I wouldn’t want to deal with the circus. Are people coming to see you because you’re gay? Would I want to do interviews every day, where people are asking: ‘So you’re taking showers with guys – how’s that?’

“If you’re playing well it will be reported as: ‘The gay footballer is playing well.’ And if you have a bad game it’ll be: ‘Aw, that gay dude … he’s struggling because he’s gay.’ Fuck it. I don’t want to mess with that.”

Thoughtfully when pressed on the possibilities of other gay footballers, Rogers says “No. Even now, one of my best friends said: ‘Do we know anyone else in football who could possibly be gay?’ And we couldn’t think of anyone. We’re such great actors because we’re afraid to let people know who we are. We’ve been trained by our agents how to do interviews, how to present ourselves. No footballer has since said to me, ‘Robbie, thank you, I’m gay too…’ I don’t know if anyone will.”

“I know things will change. There will be gay footballers. I just don’t know when and how long it will take. The next step is how do you create an atmosphere where men and women feel it’s OK to come out and continue to play? It’s a great question. Football has so much history. It’s a great sport with so much culture and tradition. But I’m positive there will be changes.”

The full interview can be read at The Guardian website here.