Life is a sequence of events, that when taken in the aggregate and with the benefit of hindsight appears to be interconnected. Each instance in our lives builds on a past event, and the knowledge gained propels us forward to the next plateau or learning experience.
In order for us to learn and grow, we must also be open to change and the lessons to be learned. Sometimes, we don’t recognize the event for what it is; a time of growth and evolution. Growth and evolution cause us to reflect on things that are no longer germane to our existence or no longer represent who we really are.
We have heard many times that it is not what happens it is how one reacts to what has happened. Depending on the event and whether the lesson is grounded in a good or bad experience, will determine how we react to it.
Clearly, we all wish that our learning experiences were grounded in pleasant experiences. But most times the more substantive lessons to be learned are not grounded in the good things that happen to us. The most often remembered lessons learned are derived from unpleasant or uncomfortable experiences. Painful as they may be, it is the less than desired experiences that make us dig deeper within ourselves and question what truly matters to us.
When I look back on my life, I clearly can see that the more distressing the experience, the greater the jump forward was. Often times we fail to realize that bad events are the bigger catalyst to personal growth and we realize that fact after the distressing event is over and we are beyond the short-term fear and agony.
Being a closeted queer individual, this is a no truer lesson! The fear and agony related to hiding one’s true self wreaks untold havoc on a person’s psyche. Overcoming that fear and anguish by coming out, propels us forward toward achieving personal greatness. Embrace your distressing moments and learn from them. Do not deny their existence and try to ignore what it is that is holding you back.
Take charge and decide to make those decisions that will allow you to grow and evolve into the person you are truly meant to be. Embrace your agony and confront that which is causing the anguish. You will not regret it especially after you overcome the challenge.